My best friend called it “going for another round.” It took me years to realize that I was addicted to the experience of dating itself.There is a great deal of novelty in meeting new people and experiencing new things with them while clinging to the distant hope that one of them just might click.
Meeting someone new, going on a few great dates, getting excited, having one/both of you sort of stop calling; then repeating the process over and over is enough to make you want to give up for good.
The ups and downs in this cycle can make you feel like you are unbalanced and have whiplash.
So they often parrot off clichés like “you’ll meet the right one when you most expect it” and “you’ll find him when you aren’t looking.” When you’re on this emotional roller coaster, these well meaning statements are enough to make you want to cold clock someone in the face.
How exactly do you even meet anyone if you aren’t looking?
I could let myself off the hook and let the dating experiences just be what they were instead of tying my ego to them.
When I stopped hanging so much of my feelings on these experiences, I started meeting completely different people than ever before.
I hope wherever you are in your journey today, you’ll realize that you are worth being pursued.
You deserve a man who is willing to do whatever it takes to capture your heart. If you want to read the story of the relationship I chased after for eight long years (I am living proof that chasing is a bad idea), grab my book (& New York Times Bestseller) I’ve Never Been to Vegas But My Luggage Has at any bookstore or order it here!
When you strongly view yourself as a whole person who is looking for someone to share your life with, it takes away some of the fear that they won’t like you, that your destiny is hanging on this outing, and that if they don’t approve of you, you are back to square one.
So many people carry around the same negative thoughts about their desirability.
I could either continue to view my dating experiences as abysmal failures that reflected poorly upon my self-worth and keep letting my self-esteem circle the drain.